


What's Hidden Can Be Found|Tyrus Summer Camp AU

by nataratata



Category: Andi Mack (TV), Disney - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Summer Camp, Ambi - Freeform, Andi Mack - Freeform, Angst, Anxiety, Cabins, Canon but not really, Competition, Crushes, Disney Channel, Drama, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Forests, Gay, High School, Hiking, I had to okay, Implied Relationships, Lakes, Longing, Love, M/M, Muffy - Freeform, Pining, Post Finale, Rain, Rivalry, Rivers, SO GAY, Self-Esteem Issues, Stargazing, Tyrus - Freeform, Tyrus Week, Unresolved Tension, Very american, Weed, because this is my fic and yeah what about it, camp traditions, creek - Freeform, cursing, ish, its complicated, jonah and sports, like after freshman year, lingering looks, lots of tree imagery for some reason, reed may or may not show up im not sure yet, water as cleansing, you get the picture
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-24
Updated: 2019-07-28
Packaged: 2020-07-12 18:53:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 12,067
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19951150
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nataratata/pseuds/nataratata
Summary: Camp Lowland sleepaway camp is an hour drive from Shadyside, where tensions and disagreements have been left for time to mend. But what will Tj and Cyrus do when the past comes chasing after them? Follow the Good Hair Crew and The Good Boys through their annual two-month stay in the wilderness where nature does not care for petty arguments and time has only worsened their situation.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> *takes place about one to two years after the finale**summer after freshman year of high school bcs idk if they're in 7th or 8th lol thx disney//
> 
> Disclaimer: ive never been to summer camp lmao but I did go to camp in sixth grade so forgive me if my knowledge of summer camp culture is off. FOR TYRUS WEEK!! follow/message me on tumblr @frisbee-camp lmk what you think in the comments!!

TJ squinted when the hot forest sun hit his eyes. It was hot. Actually properly hot. Another degree up and the pine trees would have kindled and Camp Lowland would have burned down. TJ’s duffle bag pinched his shoulder as he walked towards the main camp lawn where the rest of Sunnyside teens congregated around the flagpole. He always enjoyed this weird annual tradition where parents sent their kids to the middle of nowhere to annoy other slightly older teenagers. Anyone who was anyone went to Camp Lowland, this meant all of his school friends would be there. His smiled widened as he was met with hugs from William, Lucas, Grant and his other basketball friends. There were about a hundred or so campers this year, a little less than last year thought TJ.

“YO, TJ!!” Someone to his right called out to him. It was Marty, trailed by Jonah. Marty’s hair had gotten fluffier, he had grown taller since middle school. Jonah had also gotten taller and now had a soccer players body since he switched from Frisbee to the more recognized sport. TJ jogged to his friends and gave them hugs.

“Hey guys, what’s up? Where are we this year?” He dropped his bag around the compact grassy field and looked around. Camp Lowland was set in a valley surrounded by tall prickly pine trees. There was a river on the east side and a lake in the north, and a soccer field and basketball in the west. There were four cabins at Camp Lowland: Redwood, Aspen, Oak, and Willow. All situated on the edges of the grassy field in a rhombus layout with Redwood in the north, Aspen in the east, Oak in the west, and Willow in the south. They were big and luxurious as someone had recently donated an excessive amount of money to them. TJ loved it. No school. No teachers. No stress. Just him, his friends, the wilderness, and fun. He felt like a dog let loose in a flower field.

“We’re Redwood, all three of us. Cool right?” Jonah smiled his classic smile. Tj, Marty, and Jonah had formed their own little posse Andi had named The Good Boys. Tj didn’t even remember how they became such good friends, one day he just found himself in a group chat with the three of them and no one else. In a year they were inseparable. He had a feeling they had been set up by Andi and Buffy, but no one complained. They were some of the only people TJ could completely trust.

“Yeah, cool,” TJ said cooly and looked around in the crowd. He couldn’t see Andi or Buffy or even…

“You looking for Cyrus?” Marty had noticed him looking around, “he’s already in WIllow with Andi and Buffy.” Marty gave him a sympathetic smile. He always kept an eye on Cyrus since he was still with Buffy. Tj returned with a shy smile.

“You ready to go?” Jonah said as he dragged his bag towards Redwood.

“Yeah let’s go,” TJ said without looking back.

Tj loved the new renovations, now it meant that there were four people per room in each cabin with ten rooms in each cabin. Five for boys and five for girls on opposite sides of the hall. By some glorious luck, the Good Boys were all in one room. There were two bunk beds but no one came to claim the last bed. Marty and Jonah took the top bunks, leaving TJ alone on the bottom. Once they settled in, TJ opened the window that overlooked the lake. It was glistening and alive and it took all of TJ’s will to not jump in right now. It wasn’t as hot as it was when he got to Camp, but it was still enough to cause his t-shirt to cling to him. At least the breeze cooled as the sun started going down.

Later that evening, when the camp counselors had introduced themselves and their ridiculous camp names, Tj found himself searching the mass of teenagers for a boy with dark hair. Each cabin had their own fire pit and was roasting marshmallows and introducing themselves to each other, but that didn’t mean Tj couldn’t see the other campers in adjacent fire pits. During high school, TJ had tried to move away from the mean jock stereotype but it was impossible to control how people saw him. He still played basketball, was the best on the team and the captain of JV, but that didn’t make him any less self-conscious. He didn’t have much more to hide really, except maybe his dyscalculia, but everyone knew he was gay or questioning or whatever you want to call it. But they still didn’t know him like, like him. Tj found the back of Cyrus’ head on Andi’s shoulder around the Willow fire. He knew he probably hated being outdoors, probably hated the dirt and the sun. He gave himself a sad smile and burnt his marshmallow on purpose.

After introductions and camp songs Tj had sung a million times, the cabins were allowed to mill about and socialize. The Good Boys and the Good Hair Crew immediately found each other in the crowd.

“Hey!” Andi said, “Aren’t the renovations awesome! We all get our own bathrooms now!”

TJ zoned out after that. They laughed and talked while Tj hid his hands in his pockets. He tried to catch eyes with Cyrus, but he kept looking away from him at the last second. Tj decided that he couldn’t be there anymore and said, “I’m gonna get some chocolate.”

Tj found himself mindlessly chewing on a gummy bear at the snack table. There were all sorts of goodies laid out in front of him, sour candies and chocolate bars, a big bowl of fluffy marshmallows, strawberries, crispy mountain apples, and lots of chips and popcorn. Any other day and Tj would have devoured the entire table, but not today. He reached for a marshmallow to roast and brushed hands with someone familiar.

Tj’s eyes fluttered up.

“Hey,” Cyrus said shyly.

“Hi,” Tj said just as quietly. Tj had his glasses on, the flame from the fire reflected over them and half of his face making him look a little warmer than usual.

“Um,” Cyrus looked down at their still touching hands and inched his way. Tj missed the sensation. “I think there are enough marshmallows to go around,” Cyrus joked. It was nice to hear him laugh, even it if was just a small one.

“Yeah, but who knows. You know I could eat an entire bowl of this stuff,” Tj said.

“Yeah I know,” Cyrus was staring at him. It made him shuffle his feet and look towards his friends.

“How’s your room?” TJ asked trying to ease the tension but if Andi came over right now she’d be able to cut it with scissors.

“Probably not as nice as yours,” Cyrus blinked once. Tj thought he saw his cheeks pinked, but it could have been the heat from the fire.

“Well, you are in Willow…” Tj teased. It was camp tradition that the opposite cabins were rivals. This meant Redwood rivaled Willow and Aspen rivaled Oak. At the end of the summer, whichever camp amassed the most points would have a tree named after the cabin leader. Tj was sure it was just an excuse to plant two trees every year, but it wasn’t about who won at the end, he just loved the competition. Sometimes the cabins would form alliances, last year Aspen won because Redwood helped them during a scavenger hunt, and in return, they let rabbits loose in Willow. Not the fluffy cute rabbits, these ones had rabies. The camp almost shut down because of the scandal but no one found out that it was all Amber and Tj’s idea.

Cyrus laughed a little, “Whatever cabin leader, don’t let the power get to your head.” Being cabin leader meant TJ and the other cabin leaders, Amber for Aspen (again), Iris in Oak, and Buffy in Willow, could choose what days the cabin wide competitions would be held. It may seem small, but every cabin had a strategy. Even the ones with alliances.

“Oh don’t worry Cyrus, it already has,” Tj knew he was looking for too long. He probably had that dumb grin he got around Cyrus.

Cyrus hummed softly and poked a marshmallow through his marshmallow skewer and walked back towards the group. TJ’s heart rate finally calmed down when he left.

The next day began cabin competition or ‘Cabin Comp’ preparations. One competition worth 200 points held at the end of each week and culminating in the final competition which was yet to be determined by the cabin leaders. But during the week each cabin could win up to 50 points, two max for each cabin member that exhibited good behavior, excellent camping skills, or any other skill that the counselors felt deserved an award. That meant there was a maximum of 2,000 points. Tj’s cabin last year had won 1,582 but Amber’s had won a perfect 2,000. He didn’t care though, because he still beat Willow. It was sort of like Hogwarts, except the only magic came from the adrenalin rush he got from playing basketball with his friends.

Tj spent most of the week playing basketball and soccer with the Good Boys. He tried concentrating on figuring out a strategy for the first game: capture the flag. It seemed like Buffy was working on a strategy too since she kept giving him cold glances during morning announcements and in the mess hall. Last year she had gotten only 50 points less than Tj, a little too close for Tj’s taste. He had a feeling she was keeping her cabin members away from the Redwoods, which was understandable since he was doing the same with the Willows. During the first week, campers usually stuck to their own cabins and through the summer tensions calmed until a couple of weeks to the last Cabin Comp.

“Yo T!” He heard Jonah call to him, “you good dude?” Jonah held the basketball on his hip, his blue eyes the same color as the river he was staring into.

“Yeah, I’m good just thinking,” He said absentmindedly.

“Yeah? About CC1?” Marty said a little out of breath. CC1 stood for Cabin Competition One.

Tj just sighed and nodded. “Bro if you need help thinking you know you can ask us right?” Jonah added. Tj’s lip quirked up. For some reason, he thought he could do it alone. He tried not to get caught up in the cabin leader mentality where he only thought the competition was between him and the other leaders.

“How ‘bout now?” Tj said, surprising even himself.

The rest of the night Tj, Jonah, and Marty spent sitting on the floor of their room. Tj had to step out to do room inspections with the cabin counselor Luke, a 20 something with way too much energy and who always smelled like some illegal substance. TJ liked him nonetheless, he was cool and never talked down to his campers.

“Hey, TJ. Don’t worry about all that CC stuff I know we’ll win like last year” Luke whispered as they tiptoed around the cabin with flashlights making sure all the campers were accounted for.

“I don’t know Luke, this year feels different, like a bad version of deja vu or something,” Tj breathed out.

“Just think positive and you’ll attract those good vibes,” Luke said. He had a habit of trying to give everyone he met a psychic reading. Let’s just say that he was 0% psychic.

“I don’t even know why I’m cabin leader again,” Tj was surprised when he was voted as cabin leader around the campfire last night. This would be the third year in a row he’d been elected. Same with the other cabin leaders.

“Just think of it as the universe rewarding you, you know you can always give it to someone else,” Luke trailed, “like I don’t know, Jonah or even Marty or something. I know you guys are basically the same person.” Luke gave an airy laugh and clicked his flashlight off.

“I don’t know dude,” TJ said, “I guess they trust me or whatever.” Tj actually thought his cabin members were just playing a trick on him. It wasn’t that he was mean anymore, he just thought that they thought he was still a jerk. Maybe he had been wrong. Maybe he was leveled and a good leader.

When he got back to his room Jonah and Marty had perfected the strategy. Tj smiled as it was laid out in front of him in his friends’ messy boyish handwriting. “Perfect” he finally said after examining it.

When CC1 day came, the mess hall buzzed with excitement. Everyone was nervously chittering away as TJ slurped down two bowls of cereal. He found himself staring at Buffy’s table, more specifically to Cyrus who looked tired but content as he bit into a slice of bacon.

“Tj,” Jonah said to him, “Focus, we need you.”

“You’re right, sorry” Tj felt his nose pink just as Cyrus met his eyes and quickly looked away.

Tj stood on the steps of the Redwood cabin as he explained the rules and strategy of CC1: capture the flag. The plan was simple. They would not ally themselves with either Oak or Aspen, they were to directly look for Willows flag. Half of them would defend and the other half would go searching spread out evenly and with whistles to use as signals and to blow if any of them were in trouble. A third of the searchers would run at full speed and while Willow was distracted another third would follow and when they least expected it the last third would storm. Tj had only a faint idea of where the flag was. He knew that Redwoods' flag was on the dock in the middle of the lake, Aspen’s would probably be on the other side of the river, Willows would be somewhere around the willow tree they were named after, and Oak’s would be on the top of the hill their cabin was in front of. This meant that all the flags would be behind the cabins, they’d have to run through the open field. Once they ran, Willow would know their plan.

He looked out at his cabin members, kids he had known since he was a toddler. They knew him and trusted him and Tj felt his heart soar like when it does when he captains the basketball team. He took a deep breath and looked out at the other cabins. The sun was just as hot as the first day they were there. Hot. Not warm or steamy but a humid sticky hot. Here we go he thought.

“Change of plans,” Tj said suddenly. “Searchers, go in your ambush groups but sneak behind Aspen and Oak before going into Willow’s territory."

It was a good thing he changed the plan because Buffy had chosen to use the strategy he abandoned at last minute. He didn’t know how she had learned it, but once the whistle blew from Head Counselor Moose she and 10 other cabin members stormed. TJ laughed knowing that his cabin would know exactly how to get them out. Marty had volunteered to guard the flag himself. Tj lead one of the ambush groups behind Oak and Jonah behind Aspen. They were sneaky but even then some of them were tagged out leaving only Jonah and Tj to quietly look for the Willow tree. And then it was there. After what felt like thirty years of walking and a gallon of sweat, Tj saw the enormous and beautiful Willow tree. Andi’s sculptures could never compare to the real thing. This one was tall, with branches that hung low and swayed in the wind. It was incredibly green and lush and just slightly tinged pink along the borders. The suns' heat didn’t even phase this part of the forest. It’s rays gently seeped through the leaves, leaving a fuzzy warm light. The grass was taller than normal here, rising above Tj’s ankles. Wildflowers dotted the base of the tree, light purple, and yellow and pink. TJ crept closer to the tree, it must have been a trick, this was too easy. He saw the flag peaking around the corner of the trunk, it was neon orange and foreign in such a natural environment. Tj went to grab it but someone also poked their head around the trunk.

“You didn’t think you’d be able to just take it did you?” Squinted up an already sunburnt Cyrus. Tj jumped back. He wasn’t expecting to talk to Cyrus today, especially not have him holding the flag that could get him 200 points.

“I uh-“ Tj blinked in surprise as Cyrus stood up to his full height. He wasn’t holding the flag, he was the flag. Buffy had tied it around his waist. Not against the rules but fowl play. Of course she would do this. She knew Tj would come himself and she knew he couldn’t just snatch it from Cyrus’ body. Tj vowed to take revenge.

But Cyrus looked so cute in the Weeping Willow tree’s soft light. He had a blue wildflower behind his ear and had tried weaving himself a flower crown. It was crooked on his head. He must have been here for a long time. Probably before the cabin leaders even explained the rules.

“Yes?” Cyrus swayed slightly, he seemed proud of the predicament he had put Tj in.

“I uh,” Tj swallowed and saw Jonah out of the corner of his eye, “I came for the flag.”

Cyrus considered this for a moment and then saw Jonah in Tj’s line of sight, “Tell Jonah that if he comes any closer I’ll tag you out and run. You know you can’t afford that because Buffy is probably just as close to your flag.” He was right. Geez. Cyrus was enjoying this, his eyes glinted and he had a small smile.

“Marty’s guarding ours.”

“Yeah, she knows,” Cyrus sighed slightly, “do you think she cares?” Tj knew Marty and Buffy were so in love it disgusted him, but he also knew Buffy would take the flag without hesitation.

“So what do you want me to say that will make you give me the flag?” Tj blurted. He hated this weird tension they had.

Cyrus looked angry now, “I don’t want you to say anything. Why are you being a jerk?”

Tj grunted in frustration, his win was a foot away from him but he couldn’t get it because of his feelings.

“I don’t know Cyrus?! Why are you so weird around me?!” Tj could tell that his voice had raised. It made Cyrus cower a bit, but he quickly regained his angry face.

“You broke me TJ! You know that.” Cyrus was about the cry, TJ could tell by the way he spit out every word.

“What? Wh-“

And then Camp Counselor Moose’s whistle blew. Buffy had won.


	2. Downhill

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Camp Lowland thaws unseen ice

"I knew that would work!" Buffy had yelled in joy at Cyrus. Cyrus thought his lungs were running out of air, or the trees had stopped producing oxygen, or he was just dying in general while hiking back to his temporary home in the Willow cabin. The day hadn't ended, and all the campers were free to explore the different camping activities, but Cyrus just wanted to sit somewhere without bugs threatening his life wherever he stepped and competitions threatening his morals.

After Buffy had won the flag for Willow and Kira had won the flag for Oak (Iris' cabin). The winning teams were given special bandanas and had been awarded an extra 15 points for winning the first CC. This meant that Cyrus had to go around sporting a horrendously yellow bandana around his arm. Buffy and Iris were given the traditional wreaths to put on their cabins doors. Since Willow's color was yellow, they were given a wealth with yellow flowers and golden colored pinecones. Iris was given one with herbs like dill and mint that would dry and make the Oak cabin smell delicious. It was a nice commencement gesture, a sort of "let the games begin" sort of tradition but Cyrus just wished they had washed the bandanas maybe ten more times before giving them to the campers. 

Finally, after having to quickly congratulate Buffy and fidget while watching her place the wreath on the door, Cyrus was alone. It felt like he could breathe for the first time since CC1 began. The other campers weren't too fond of staying indoors during the daytime, but Cyrus liked it because there was never anyone there. The entire day was exhausting, from finding out that he would be the flag to having to talk to TJ while he was glistening in the willow trees fuzzy light...he sighed. Cyrus sat on the rocking chair in the common room and placed his head in his hands. He took a couple of deep breaths and tried to think rationally. 

"This is fine," Cyrus whispered to himself as he sat back and lightly breathed out, "You're okay Cyrus." He rocked the chair while looking out the big cabin windows that looked out into the forest, "It's just the woods, no one has been killed in the forest recently so the odds are fine and it's just TJ. It's fine. It's all in the past. Just move-"

"I agree," said Andi.

"Oh," Cyrus said with a start, "Andi don't sneak up on me like that!"

Andi gave a wide laugh, "Cyrus," she said, "this is summer camp. That means you gotta enjoy summer. The outside. Outdoors. Fresh air. Ever heard of it?"

Cyrus pouted. He wanted to stay inside where the worms couldn't get him. 

"Come on old man, you can rock in that chair when you're old and wrinkly," Andi said as she grabbed him by the hand. She noticed Cyrus avoiding her eyes, "hey," she said a little softer, "did something happen? We won remember?"

Cyrus gave his signature crumpled furrowed brow look and said, "TJ."

"He didn't do anything to you did he?" Andi immediately looked at Cyrus' face for signs of injury. All she found was his pouty face. 

"No, he just-" Cyrus groaned, "he's just around." Cyrus rocked back in his chair and looked into the green unknown of the pine trees. Some days he was fine when he thought about TJ and other times he just annoyed him that he was always thinking about him which would make him think TJ was more annoying than he actually was which also annoyed him which made him think he was being ridiculous which annoyed him even more. 

"Yeah yeah pouty boy come on let's get your mind off of him, as if that's even possible," Andi then dragged him up out of his chair and as soon as Cyrus stood up he slumped against her like a ton of rocks, "I seriously cannot carry you, Cy," she laughed, " come on we're getting you out of your weird funk." 

Through the years Andi had made the arts and crafts room her bitch, for lack of a better word. She was everywhere in that room. Everywhere. As in she had self-portraits and intricate bracelets and sculptures of something Cyrus thought was deep but couldn't really make out the meaning of yet. Cyrus had tried to find something he was interested in since he started high school but he was really only good at following around his friends with hobbies. Andi had her art and Buffy had her sports, and Cyrus had them. It pained him to think his college resume may be a little sparse but his life had been a little sparse lately. 

What Cyrus had found out about following his friends around was that he actually wasn't half bad at making clay pottery. He just didn't know if he was actually good or if everyone else around him was just horrible, but he was actually proud of his little bowls. Plus the spinning clay always calmed him down a bit. 

Buffy was off celebrating with the other cabin members so Andi and Cyrus were alone in the arts and crafts room. 

After many painted mugs and various necklaces made by Andi, she said without looking up, "Do you want to talk about it?" 

"Nope," Cyrus said quickly. 

The next couple of weeks were painless. Cyrus had found a routine of fiddling in the art room with Andi, watching Buffy play sports with Marty, and avoiding one on one conversation with TJ at all costs. But most of the time he and his friends would go around to the different camp stations and fail at things like archery while Buffy got extra points for their cabin. 

Cyrus and his friends were sitting in a circle sharing a bag of skittles they'd gotten from the Camp Store one calm and windy afternoon. Cyrus was finally getting comfortable with always being in contact with dirt. He even laid on it from time to time. He liked looking at the clouds float by but if he looked up for too long he would find himself thinking about Earth and then other planets like Mars and then the galaxy and everything beyond that and time and light and darkness so he'd sit up and tune back into his friend's conversations. 

"So," Buffy said, "CC3 is tomorrow and guess what we chose?!" Buffy said sparkling. Cyrus wished he could be this excited about this. He honestly just missed paved roads. He didn't even remember what the last CC was, maybe it was a swimming contest? 

"Canoe racing!" Buffy had exclaimed without waiting for her friends to respond. 

"Awww!" Andi said, "Amber loves canoe racing. Remember when we all raced together?" Andi had a very wide happy grin on her face, she must've been remembering something that had happened between her and Amber. 

"Yeah," Buffy was amused, "and half of us almost drowned," Cyrus said as he popped the last skittle in his mouth. 

"Maybe," Buffy said as she mindlessly picked at the grass, "but Redwood doesn't know that we've been practicing."

"Who? You and the basketball team?" Andi said perking up. Andi and Cyrus had been so busy wandering and failing at activities that they hadn't noticed any CC preparations from Buffy. They appreciated that Buffy didn't include them in making strategies, they did last year and it caused more harm than good. 

"Yeah, don't tell but we dragged an old canoe into the woods and have been practicing," Buffy said proudly. 

"Wow," was all that Andi and Cyrus could tell her. 

Early the next day was CC3: Canoe Racing. Cyrus almost cried as he had to put on that ugly yellow bandana around his arm for the third time. He walked over to the lake with his entire cabin. Since the lake was behind Redwood, they usually had first dibs when it came to canoes. The lake was smooth today, with the morning mist just now evaporating and the ducks floating around the sides. It was a good-sized lake with a dock extending north. Redwoods were already huddled and getting a pep talk by TJ. TJ, Cyrus thought and sighed longingly. He forced himself to look away from him. He didn't have his glasses on today and was looking very tall and in charge. He could tell his cabin to do anything he wanted and they would. 

"Okay guys," Buffy said to the Willows, "this is it. We know what to do okay? So I'm not going to scare you with an intimidating speech." She had her arms crossed and had her cabin leader bandana lose around her neck. "Just stay focussed and row. And really put your whole weight into it. If you're competing today come on and get ready." Only six of them would row the one Willow canoe while the rest of them cheered from the bleachers. 

Cyrus obviously didn't even think about signing up and neither had Andi who said she was too short to keep up with them, so they sat in the bleachers and shared yellow cotton candy. The announcer Counselor Moose, with the red beard that hid way too much of his face, announced the rules over a megaphone while the rowers got into position at the starting line. 

It was quiet as Moose said "Get ready," the crowd was sitting on the edge of the hard metal, "Set," everyone inhaled and Cyrus saw TJ turn. Cyrus thought that he was giving some last-minute advice to his team, but he actually turned towards the bleachers and gave Cyrus a very slight smile and wave, Cyrus returned the favor timidly. "GO!" Moose yelled and the entire bleachers erupted into a collective yell. Cyrus sat there in a stunned grin at the thought that TJ remembered him at last minute. The interaction actually put the Redwood cabin an entire two feet behind the rest of the teams. Andi had to yell their cabin cheer at Cyrus to get him out of his dreamlike phase. Cyrus figured that she hadn't noticed the interaction. 

TJ's hair rhythmically bobbed with his movements. He had gotten a lot taller since he was getting older and playing basketball so frequently now. Cyrus couldn't help but notice his jawline being reflected in the sunlight, his lean muscle leading his team members, his poise and strength. Cyrus remembered when he had helped him get that muffin from the cafeteria so long ago, that felt like centuries. 

TJ had really remembered him. Cyrus chanted the Willow cabin cheer but secretly hoped Redwood would win. 

And they did, only by a couple of inches but they won fair and square. Same with Aspen. Cyrus pretended to be sad for Buffy's sake, but he and Andi were basically jumping up and down on the bleachers. 

Cyrus spent the next few days in his same routine but now with a smile, he could only attribute to TJ. 

On Monday Cyrus was scheduled, yes scheduled to go on a nature hike with campers from all four cabins. Some sort of mandatory bonding activity. Cyrus almost cried when he saw the posting. Every camper had one scheduled camp-wide activity every week, last week it was fire building with Amber. But this? Hiking. Hiking. He would have rather jumped into the tiny fire he had built with Amber last week.

When he got to the meeting spot, the willow tree not far behind his cabin, he found a very strange group of people. They were being led by counselor Luke from Redwood and a couple of other counselors Cyrus didn't know the name of, Andi (thank God), Gus, Walker, some kids from the grade below them and TJ who was laughing with Luke. TJ saw him and gave him a quick smile. Normally Cyrus would have avoided him at all costs, but something was telling him that it wouldn't be that bad. He did acknowledge him before the race and everything. 

The hike was on the Air & Water trail, one that went all the way up to the top of the valley and then back down to the river by Aspen. But that was the least of Cyrus' worries. His first was trying not to die from heat exhaustion, hunger, and thirst. He was already trailing behind the others five minutes in. He really did not know if he would survive this Oddessy. 

He, Andi, and Walker had formed their own little walking group, talking between stops made by Luke who always felt like pointing out cool trees. Walker and Andi had become friends ever since she started going to art school, and Walker was nice enough to talk to but Cyrus couldn't stop looking at the back of TJ's head. Tj had of course been able to keep up with Luke who Cyrus had a feeling could have gone a lot faster but couldn't risk having Cyrus trail so far behind. 

"Now guys look at this tree, you see how..." Luke had stopped to inspect a wide light-colored tree no one else cared about. 

"Hey," TJ said as he came up next to him, "fascinating stuff huh?" he joked. 

Cyrus laughed a bit. Some other campers turned to look at him. He looked down. "Yeah," he had to lean into TJ so the others wouldn't hear them, "totally man" he mocked Luke. TJ cracked a smile too. 

TJ walked next to him while they hiked, they laughed and chatted and poked fun at Luke. It was nice, calming, familiar. He hadn't felt this familiarity in over a year. He missed it but reminded himself of why he had to miss it. Nonetheless, Cyrus allowed himself this moment, this grueling sweaty stinky moment to feel like old times. 

"If you die here," Tj said, "Can I have your laptop?"

"If I die here," Cyrus retorted, "and if you carry me back to camp, then you can share my laptop with Andi." He smiled. Actually smiled. Cyrus thought he would float away from happiness at any moment. 

Cyrus felt brave as they stood at the top of the valley. He could see camp down below and the surrounding miles of woods. He had gotten to the top without needed someone to carry him. The sky was so blue, so so blue. He hadn't noticed how nice nature could really be. 

"Hard part's over," Tj said, "it's all downhill from here."

And as they stood on the top of that mountain, the wind blowing away their teenage smell, Cyrus breathed in and closed his eyes. He thought of all the stresses he'd have to face one day. He thought about everything he was avoiding, the homework, the studying, the tests, college. He breathed out and let it go. He opened his eyes and Tj was looking down at him with a look he was so familiar with, the soft one that was reserved for late-night conversations.

Cyrus looked back at him and quietly asked, "Did you wave at me during CC3?"

"Yeah," Tj said without hesitation. 

"Why?"

"Because I was thinking of you," Tj said warmly. He really meant it. Cyrus blushed and looked back over the valley. 

TJ was right, it was all downhill from there. The way down was easier than the way up, but Cyrus still found a reason to ask for a piggyback ride from TJ. It must have rained recently because the way downhill was also damp and muddy. Many people slipped in the thick stuff, especially Gus who was covered up to the waist in the brown goop. TJ even slipped as he carried Cyrus on his back, but he never let Cyrus touch the ground. He would be eternally grateful for that. 

Eventually, Cyrus could see the river close to the Aspen cabin. He wondered what Andi and Amber were doing right now, probably frolicking in the flower field by the Willow Tree or something cinematic like that. 

Tj's foot slid in the mud a couple more times before the slope finally leveled. Finally, they had reached the river and walked along the bank when Tj's foot slid one more time, this time hurling Cyrus into the river's shallows with a tumble.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gays+water...what could go wrong?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> andi mack officially ended today and i am in tears idk what to do with myself i have no coherent thoughts thaydies and gentlethem

Tj thought he had actually killed him. He stood in shock for a moment and then jumped to drag Cyrus back onto dry land. 

"Cyrus! Cyrus? Are you okay can you hear me? What hurts?" He yelled to a dazed and mud-covered boy. It didn't look like he had any broken bones, but it was impossible to tell under all that mud. 

"Huh?" Cyrus mumbled and squinted at him. 

"Oh dang," Luke muttered after rushing to Cyrus. Luke told TJ to take him to the nurse. 

Tj carried Cyrus bridal style with Andi and Walker running with him. He felt horrible. He did this. It was his fault. They were doing so good and now... 

Cyrus was covered in mud and grass and twigs and other things Cyrus probably hated. Neither Andi nor Walker blamed him for this, but TJ felt so horrible he wanted to cry and rip his skin off. It didn't matter if they thought it was his fault, what mattered was if Cyrus could ever forgive him. 

He stayed by Cyrus' side in the nurses' station until Cyrus came to and started complaining about how much it hurt. Eventually, he was shooed outside when she went to hose the mud off of him. 

TJ sat on the steps of the small nurses' cabin with Andi while they waited for Walker to come back for the rest of their friends. 

"This isn't your fault," Andi said to him. There weren't many instances where they spoke to each other, but any friend of Cyrus was his friend too. 

Tj just shook his head which he held in one hand. He had a stick in the other and was poking at the compact dirt, wishing he could be anywhere else, be anyone else, feel something else. It was torture. Silent tears rolled down his grimy face, he sniffled. "Yeah, it was Andi," he said after a long time, "We were doing so good too, I thought I finally had his trust again. I don't know I just-" he picked up his head and looked at Andi, "I just ruin everything."

Andi placed a gentle hand on Tj's shoulder, "You don't ruin everything TJ, you just have um," she looked towards the forest for inspiration, "bad luck." 

TJ sighed. 

"Look," she said, "he'll be fine. Just a couple scratches I'm sure. Plus, time heals all wounds right?"

Tj didn't respond after that. He simply waited on the steps for Walker to bring Jonah, Buffy, Marty, and Jonah. It didn't take long for the nurse to tell them they could all come in. 

Inside, Cyrus was cleaned enough and in a medical gown to see where twigs and sharp rocks had badly damaged his skin. Half of his face had been damaged too and the nurse was bandaging his arm as he winced. His wounds were bleeding and raw, it made Tj's eyes prickle with more tears.

"Cyrus," Buffy said as she hugged him, "I'm so glad you're okay. Don't scare me like that again!"

As the rest of the friends talked to Cyrus and asked him what happened, Tj sat on a plastic chair against the wall. When the friends by the sound of the dinner bell, TJ was greeted by an ice-cold stare from Buffy. His heart froze in his chest. 

He decided that he didn't need dinner, so he stayed with Cyrus as the nurse finished bandaging a sprained finger. He blew it, again. Everyone would know that this was his fault. They'd blame him, he was sure of it. Worse than that, Cyrus hadn't met his eye since the fall. 

The nurse gave him some pain medicine and left them alone. Cyrus laid down and said, "Are you going to come over here or are you just gonna stare at me like a stalker."

"Sorry," TJ mumbled as he brought his chair closer to his bedside. TJ didn't know what the nurse had given him but he was sure he was in some medically approved high. 

"Whatever," Cyrus looked like he was about to fall asleep, and he probably would've been asleep if TJ weren't distracting him. 

"Do you want me to stay?" Tj asked as he brushed some of Cyrus' hair off his forehead. Cyrus hummed and nodded slightly. "You sure?" Tj asked again. 

"Yes stupid," Cyrus grabbed Tj's hand with his unbandaged one. 

TJ gave him a small smile, "I'm really sorry Cy, I am so sorry I didn't mean for this to happen. You know I would never hurt you on purpose."

"Yeah whatever liar, love you," Cyrus said before falling asleep. 

"Oh," Tj said softly, "Okay, love you too." Cyrus was still holding his hand. He wasn't sure if he was supposed to go now that Cyrus was asleep but he also didn't want to leave him alone, So he gave him a soft kiss on the cheek and stayed. 

Cyrus wasn't allowed to participate in camp activities for a week, and yes people did blame TJ but the rumors stayed pretty factual. Gus had told everyone the truth, that TJ slipped and Cyrus fell into the river, but he also added that Cyrus was hurled into the river and TJ had to jump in to save him before a crocodile ate him. He wasn't sure if people actually believed there was a crocodile in the Aspen River, but he did know that the crocodile was now part of scary stories and the camp songs. 

Tj had decided to sit out CC 4 and 5, leaving Marty in charge. They lost CC4, the tennis match, and a day after they had won CC5, Potato Sack Race, the Good Boys (thought TJ didn't know if he was considered a Good Boy, maybe more of an Okay Boy or just Boy), sat on a bench near the gaga pit after a soccer game. 

TJ had seen Cyrus in passing through the weeks but Buffy always steered him away from him. The guilt was eating him though. He was guilty of messing up, his fall, him kissing Cyrus on the cheek. TJ had decided one second after kissing him on the cheek that it was a horrible thing to do and he was now a registered offender. He didn't know what overcame him. He just wanted to give him some comfort in all that pain. 

The Good Boys sat on a grassy patch by the playground. Marty and Jonah talked about last nights dinner while all Tj could think about was whether or not Cyrus hated him more now and wanted nothing to do with him. Just then, the camp cat came up and nuzzled Tj's hand. He was a big Maine Coon with blue eyes that glowed in the dark. Everyone had a different name for him, but Tj liked calling him Mildred.

"Hey," Jonah smiled, "Steven's here." He reached out and gently patted the cat.

"His name is Robert now Jonah come on," Marty laughed. Tj cracked a smile too. Not a big one, but big enough to remind him that he hadn't smiled in two weeks. 

"Guys," Tj said suddenly serious, "I think I really messed up this time."

"Huh?" said Jonah.

"With Cyrus," explained Marty. 

"Oh," Jonah thought for a second, "Okay first it's not even your fault. You've apologized right?" Tj nodded a bit but in reality, he wasn't sure if Cyrus understood his apology or if he was just in a drug-induced haze. "Okay that's dosh, so what's the problem?"

"I never seem to know do I?" Tj said to Mildred as he scratched his fuzzy chin.

Jonah and Marty shared a look. Marty said, "You did throw him into the river and everything, just give him some more time. " Tj playfully punched Marty in the arm and scoffed. 

"More time," Tj said to no one. More time to mess up, he thought. 

TJ was a professional angsty teenager. After the conversation with his friends, he found himself wandering the forest bordering the cabins. He picked at trees and frowned at dead animals and cried when he saw a caterpillar get eaten by a bird. Eventually, he reached the lake behind Redwood and sat on the pebble shore. He looked out at the shimmering water. He wished he could jump in and wash away everything he had ever done wrong, but that's not how the world works. If he jumped in he would just be cold, not cleansed. 

"Hey sulker," someone sat next to him on the beach. It was Amber, his sister. 

"What do you want?" he looked away. They were on the opposite side of the dock. 

"Just wanted to see how my brothers doing I've heard some shit going around. Did you kill Cyrus? If you did I won't tell," Amber's bright eyes were reflected by the low hanging sun. she giggled at her own joke. 

"Yeah, you are quite the comedian, huh?" TJ picked up a flat round stone and turned it in his hands. 

"What? Are you gonna bash my brains in with a rock now?" Amber raised an eyebrow. He raised an eyebrow back. "But seriously, tell me what's wrong. We haven't talked in forever."

"Yeah well I guess that's just something else I mess up, huh," Tj said as he skipped the stone on the surface of the water. One. Two. Three. Plop. 

Amber rolled her eyes, "You are horrible, you know that right?" She stood up, picked up a stone the size on her palm and chucked it hard into the water. PLOP! 

Tj cocked his head and scoffed. He then picked up an even bigger rock and threw it. They spent the next half hour dragging rocks and rolling them into the lake with huffs and laughs. It was nice seeing the stones disappear into the water. He imagined his fears and insecurities floating to the bottom; his grades, the new school year, having to lead the Redwood cabin, not knowing if he'd make Varsity and go to college for basketball. He let the lake have his problems now, he didn't want them anymore. 

After they had picked they beach clean of any stone bigger than a pebble, the siblings laid down and panted due to their labor. They laughed at their seemingly unnecessary yet cathartic job. They laughed so much and for so long that by the end of it they were silent. 

"I broke him," Tj broke the silence, the cold forest wind. 

"I know," Amber said quietly. 

"I broke him and no one told me I thought It was just who I am you know? Like I try so hard. So hard. And nothing goes my way? I broke him, Amber. I broke him two years ago and I broke him two weeks ago it's just a matter of time before I do it again." TJ was crying now. Not silent, rolling, strong tears either, these were acidic tears that could burn holes into the rocks they had just thrown into the river. 

Amber laid there with him while he cried, she cried too but for different reasons. Their hands were interlaced so tightly that not even all the oil from the mess hall pizza could take them apart. 

"What am I gonna do Amb?" Tj said after the last wave of tears.

"Don't throw him into the river again."

There was a bonfire on lake Redwood Saturday that TJ only went to because everyone else was going too. He mostly stayed with Marty and Jonah who were having a 'how burnt can I get this hotdog' contest. There weren't a lot of campers, mostly cabin leaders, their close friends, and Luke, the resident "adult" who was asleep on one of the sitting logs. 

There were snacks too, same as when they roasted marshmallows, popcorns, chips, a bag of gummy worms, and chocolate. He took the bag of gummy worms. The campers had decided that the only way to take advantage of this lack of adult supervision was to play never have I ever and truth or dare which TJ decided to sit out for simply because it was more fun watching than playing. He munched on his gummy worms and sat next to Marty in the circle. TJ tried not to stare at Cyrus but he couldn't help looking at his scabs and blaming himself. The game wasn't all too interesting, they talked mostly about kissing which wasn't all that interesting to TJ. After Amber was dared into kissing Andi (totally set up by the way), TJ passed the gummy bears to Andi as a trophy. She passed them down the circle, but when they reached Marty, TJ saw him scrunch up his face. 

"Where'd you get these?" Marty asked, concerned. 

"On the snack table," TJ said and popped one in his mouth.

"How many have you had?" Marty looked back at the snack table. Tj did think it was strange that there was only one small plastic bag of the little bears. 

"I don't know, a couple? Why?" Tj looked around and saw half the campers chewing happily on them.

" These are weed gummies T, the ones Reed sells," Marty said as he waved the now empty bag in the air.

" Oh fuck," Tj looked towards Cyrus, he didn't know how many he had already eaten. He had a feeling it had been too many.

"Yeah fuck," Marty responded quietly. 

"Okay Cyrus," said Kira before Tj could warn any of his friends. She looked directly at Cyrus, who had just thrown a couple of gummy bears into his mouth. Tj winced up, he knew what Kira was capable of and he didn't want her to dare him to do something he'd regret. TJ knew it would take a while before he felt anything, but when he did Cyrus was definitely going to have a hard time. 

Cyrus' eyes fluttered towards TJ and back to Kira, "Yes?" he asked with confidence. 

"Truth or Dare," she cocked her head, her hair was tied in a bun. 

"Dare," Cyrus said almost immediately. 

Kira was surprised but gave a calm grin, "I dare you to jump into the lake." Shit. Cyrus was horrible at swimming, he could barely keep from drowning. 

The circle erupted in "Ooo's" and looked to Cyrus for his response. 

Cyrus stood up and dusted off his pants, "Fine," he said. 

"I'm jumping in with you," Tj said before realizing that he was standing too. The crowd loved this new drama. 

"What? No, you're not-" Cyrus started. 

"Cyrus, yes. I dare you to dare me to jump into the lake with you," TJ said triumphantly. 

Cyrus scoffed and looked down at Andi and Buffy who's eyebrows were raised and gave approving thumbs-ups, "Okay then."

Tj and Cyrus stood next to each other shirtless on the dock, the sun was only a couple of hours before setting so the air was still warm. The rest of the group stood behind on the beach waiting for them to jump in. 

"Any day now lovebirds!" Kira yelled from the crowd. The comment annoyed TJ. They hadn't been 'lovebirds' in forever, it made him blush nonetheless. He took a deep breath and looked at Cyrus who looked like he was about the throw up.

"Hey," Tj said softly, "it's just water. You'll be fine."

"Yeah," Cyrus tried to convince himself, "just water, no one has ever died in bodies of water. There's no such thing as drowning or sinking or drowning." 

TJ smiled to himself and stuck his hand out to Cyrus, "Together?"

Cyrus looked down and gave him a sweet smile before taking TJ's hand in his, "Together," he replied before jumping into the freezing unknown.


	4. Forecast

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I call this chapter, how to be the gayest of gay at summer camp... enjoy

They sunk like a ton of rocks, Cyrus closed his eyes and let the water surround him. The unknown was freezing alright, but it was serene, quiet, gentle. Cyrus thought being reincarnated into a fish wouldn't be half bad. When he came up for air, he saw TJ's hair hanging in his eyes. He was laughing his warm laugh that Cyrus missed so much. 

"That was exhilarating!" Cyrus said shaking his own hair out of his eyes. The crowd had gathered on the dock and was whooping and hollering. He saw a couple of them take off their camp T-shirts and jump in with them. Cyrus laughed and smiled as everyone jumped in one by one. His friends splashed and swam and laughed together in the water. For the first time in a long time, Cyrus loved Camp Lowland. 

Cyrus could only hope to keep his head afloat but it was impossible to float without bumping into anyone. He didn't know how TJ was able to avoid campers as he calmly floated on his back, Cyrus thought that either he was avoiding people or people maneuvered themselves around him. He was absolutely serene, at one with the surrounding water. He looked like he was sleeping. Cyrus had nearly forgotten about their past, or how he was bruised because of the fall not too long ago. He knew it wasn't his fault, that he slipped and Cyrus just happened to fall. But even after that, they were back to their weird tension-filled longing glances and lingering looks. He suddenly felt angry at TJ for floating so calmly, how could he just ignore everything? Cyrus splashed water on his face in revenge. 

"HEY!" Tj sprang into the water and looked around, "Did you do that?" he said with a laugh and a smile. 

Cyrus said, "Who me?" Which landed him getting him splashed in return. Soon it turned into and all around splashing war between TJ, Cyrus, and the other campers.

As the sun started setting, more and more campers crawled onto the beach and close to the fires to warm up. By then, Cyrus started feeling like he was dying. Yes, dying. His arms weren't working how he wanted them to, time had slowed down dramatically, and he felt like making a marshmallow waffle with chocolate syrup and tons of whipped cream. He let himself be led back to the beach by TJ who seemed to be dancing to music he couldn't hear. Tj plopped onto the ground and patted the space next to him. Cyrus thought that was the best idea ever and giggled, actually giggled, which led them both into a laughing fit. Now that he thought about it, Cyrus noticed that a lot of the campers were dancing and laughing more than usual. 

Tj laid on his back while Cyrus laid on his stomach closely inspecting a rock in his hands. That rock was very very interesting to Cyrus, it felt like it was giving him superpowers. 

"Mcjagger," Cyrus said to TJ as he put the rock in his hand, "this rock-" Cyrus was cut off by his own incessant laughter. He hadn't called TJ Mcjagger for years. Since Tj didn't want him calling him Thelonious Jagger, Cyrus decided that Mcjagger was close enough to lovingly annoy him. He had no idea what was happening to him, "Oh god I-," more laughter this time from TJ, "I'm dyingggg."

"NO Cyrus," TJ said seriously and took his face into his hands, "You're high." They thought it was the funniest thing in the world. But it was suddenly important that Cyrus laid his head on Tjs chest. "What? OMG Cyrus are you okay?" Tj said omg how you spell omg or lol. 

"Tj I'm dying," Cyrus said again. 

"No no well yeah we're all dying, but you called me Mcjagger, you haven't called me that in a million trillion billion trillion years," Tj lifted his arms to elaborate on how long it had been. 

"Whatever whatever," Cyrus didn't want to talk but he also wanted to talk to TJ for the rest of his life. TJ then started singing Whenever Wherever by Shakira to a giggling Cyrus. He joined his horrible rendition. 

"Why am I high?" Cyrus asked. 

"Because of the bears, the bears, they ruin everything we should rename them jaggers," Tj said to no one in particular. 

"The bears?? Oh, shit the bears." Cyrus frowned. He didn't remember smoking the bears, but then he remembered, "T! The gummy bears? You tried to kill me with your own two hands!"

"The gummy bears," Tj repeated. 

"I'm dying and you're talking about gummy bears," Cyrus mumbled and sat up, "there's something on your shoulder." A tiny green gecko had crawled onto Tj's shoulder. When Tj saw it he screamed at the top of his lungs, stood up quickly, and ran around in circles to try to get it off. 

"AHHHHHHH!!! CYRUS!! A DINOSAUR IS ON MEEEEE!" TJ yelled. 

Cyrus knew he was the only one to take care of the job. He stopped Tj and cupped the tiny creature in his hands and left it on a nearby tree. Tj hugged him, "You saved my fucking life," he said as he cupped his face in his hands and gave him a kiss on the forehead. 

Cyrus was suddenly grounded, the last couple of weeks of complicated feelings melted away. He let himself be held by Tj for a long time by the lake's shore. 

Later, they sat in the shade of the forest. They were both still stoned, but the sunset was nice, it stretched out orange and pink and the clouds reflected the light show. Cyrus cried. It was so beautiful he couldn't handle it. 

"I'm so happy I could die," Tj turned and said to him. Cyrus blinked. The light made Tj look angelic, Cyrus was sure he was sent to make him lose all of his senses. Cyrus kissed him. 

It was short, but it got the point across. 

"Cyrus," Tj said.

"No, don't say anything. Let me have this moment," he replied as he took Tj's hand. Cyrus didn't know what he was doing. Everything was so weird, nothing made sense, his actions were sporadic and his blood was made of lead. But it didn't matter, he was there sitting with TJ in the middle of the fucking woods. Nothing was real, nothing here could hurt him. If he had his heart broken again, he would just be able to throw it into lake Redwood and go back home. 

They laid down in the soft pebbles until the moon was high in the sky. Tj rubbed circles into Cyrus' hands. 

Cyrus pointed out the stars for Tj, "That's Capricorn see?" he pointed to stars that almost looked like an arrowhead. 

"Yeah I see it," Tj grinned. 

"And Ursa major," Cyrus continued, "Corvus, Andromeda," Cyrus listed all the constellations he knew, they weren't many but they still made Tj smile. He didn't even know if he was pointing the right way, the gummies had made him lazy. "And there's Ursa minor, and Orion obviously and why did you ignore me?" 

Tj didn't expect the question, he was trying to follow along with Cyrus' astronomy lesson. "I-," he stammered, "I don't know, I thought you didn't want to be around me." Tj was quiet now. 

"Who said that?" Cyrus turned onto his side and stared at him. 

"No one I just, I don't know. Things have been weird. You act like nothing happened," Tj said to the starry night sky. "I just followed your lead you know. I gave you space. I didn't know what I did. You just said you weren't ready and needed more time. If it felt like it was weird then I just...I don't know, sulked I guess. And I gave you space, like how you wanted." Tj closed his eyes as he said this, "But I never gave up the hope that you'd come back. I never even looked at anyone else, you were the only one."

Cyrus thought about this and felt guilty. That day two years ago, after they had dated for only two months, Cyrus had told Tj that he wasn't ready for a boyfriend. He told him that one day he would, but not now not when school was so hard, his friends were so distant, and he was having panic attacks almost every day. He could only handle so much pressure, he didn't want to risk hurting TJ in the process. 

"I'm sorry," Cyrus said quietly. 

"I'm serious Cyrus, I waited for you and I'm still waiting for you," Tj said as he looked up.

Cyrus blinked back tears and propped himself up on an elbow, "Fuck you TJ." Tj looked over at Cyrus and frowned. Cyrus felt two years of stress crawl up his throat, "Yeah, that's what I said. Fuck you for being so ughh" Cyrus groaned and sat up all the way, Tj followed. "You're just so unpredictable I hate you."

"You hate me? You literally just kissed me Cy," Tj gave a small smile and raised his eyebrow. 

He was right of course, his actions hadn't made any sense, he was going in circles, "I hate that you know me," Cyrus said as he grabbed at bunches of grass, "And it's not the weed okay, fuck. I just! It's everything okay! We break up and I tell you to move on and you don't, you ignore my request and then tell me you'll always be waiting for me? You're just so nice it hurts okay. And! Costume day with Kira, of all people!"

"Cyrus," Tj said concerned as he gently patted his back, "How long has that been brewing?" 

"Did you expect me to just brush everything off? Ignore my feelings? I can't fix everyone TJ. I have feelings too," Cyrus ripped up grass and weeds furious at himself for nothing and everything. Not knowing what the hell was wrong with him and not wanting to hurt TJ forced Cyrus to hurt himself instead. He wanted to scream in TJ's face and kick down doors and he didn't know why. He had never felt like that before, and it wasn't the weed's fault. He closed himself off after the breakup and never opened back up, now he was spilling all over the place and he hated it. 

"It's not fair," Cyrus continued, "It's not fair, it's not fair." Cyrus sobbed. TJ held him until he stopped. 

"Why didn't you tell me all this Cy," Tj said softly. 

"I don't know, I didn't know how to fix it so I left it broken," Cyrus said. 

"That's okay, not everything needs fixing. Things are allowed to be messy Cy," Tj said kindly. Cyrus shook his head. He had never thought about it like that, he was so focused on having the perfect relationship, that he didn't realize how imperfect relationships actually are. They're messy and erratic and all over the place but that's the fun of it. Loving someone enough to overcome all the insecurities and troubles, TJ knew this. Cyrus looked into his eyes. 

"You're right," Cyrus whispered. 

"Do you think we could try again?" Tj said as he gently picked the broken grass off of Cyrus' hands. 

Try again. Try again? Try what again? Loving Tj? That had never changed. He had never stopped loving him. Everything about Tj was just so perfect for Cyrus that he couldn't handle it. From the perfect hair that always seemed to have one strand hanging in his eyes, how he always defended him, how he'd protect him, how he had the entire school in his palm, Cyrus couldn't even list all the things he loved about TJ. He'd have to talk until the end of time. He decided to open up.

"Yes," Cyrus finally said. 

TJ's eyes glittered as he laced their fingers together, "Can I kiss you? Will you let me have this moment?" Cyrus gave an airy laugh in response. 

"Yes," Cyrus said. 

This kiss was different than the one Cyrus had hastily given him today. This kiss reminded him of how much TJ loved him, Cyrus then knew that his heart had always been with Tj. Tj pulled away far too early for Cyrus' taste. 

TJ and Cyrus had been so entranced by one another that they hadn't noticed that the at first sprinkle of rain turned into a downpour. By the time they noticed, the rain had flattened the top of TJ's hair. 

"Oh seriously?" Tj said squinting up, "that is so cliche."

Cyrus stood up and dragged TJ up with him as they laughed, "My rom-com dreams are coming true!" Cyrus said. He stood up on his tiptoes and gave Tj another kiss, "But I really don't want to get a cold." The ran was coming down now, fast and cold. Cyrus was shivering.

"Yeah, me neither," Tj said and looked towards the nearby Redwood cabin as other campers raced past them to get out of the rain. "Come on," Tj said and held his hand as they ran towards the cabin. 

Cyrus sat on the extra bed in Tj, Marty's and Jonah's room. Tj had given him a hoodie to sleep him. It was about a million sizes too big, but it made Cyrus' heart flutter. It was his Bash Mitzvah hoodie, Cyrus couldn't believe he kept it. 

"Where's Marty?" Cyrus whispered to Tj when he came back from doing rounds to make sure no one was lost or killed by a forest creature. 

"He's with Buffy, I called on the landline to tell her you were here," Tj laid down on his bed on the bottom bunk. Jonah was snoring on the top bunk, Cyrus had a feeling he'd been asleep for a long time. 

"Oh thank you," Cyrus said. The extra mattress didn't have any covers since no one had claimed it. 

"Hey, I have something for you," Tj suddenly stood up and rummaged in his bags. He sat back on his bed and opened his palm. It was an intricate green and yellow bracelet. Cyrus came and sat next to him.

"For me?" Cyrus said. Cyrus couldn't remember the last time someone had given him a gift that wasn't on his birthday. 

"Yeah," TJ said and placed it in Cyrus' hands. "I made it like three years ago and never gave it to you." Upon further inspection, he saw that read TJK+CG. Cyrus let out a breath and looked over at TJ who was blushing. 

"TJ this is so sweet I love it," Cyrus said right away. 

"Really?" TJ looked relieved. 

"Yes, now help me put it on," Cyrus said. 

TJ and Cyrus squeezed into TJ's twin bed for the rest of the night, Cyrus lightly running his fingers through Tj's hair and smiling like a kid in a candy store. He had forgotten how nice it was to have someone who knew you inside and out. He felt like he didn't have to hide around him. 

"Right, but we'll live in Malibu obviously," Tj continued. They were now discussing their future together. 

"Well yeah duh, I'll have at least five Oscars by the time I'm 40 and you'll be a celebrity physical therapist-"

"And we'll have a dog named Whiskers," Tj added.

"Whiskers? Now that's cliche Tj," Cyrus scoffed. 

"Well considering we'll have at least three dogs, I think the odds are pretty high that at least one will be Whiskers," Tj smiled. They were on their sides facing each other with their legs interlaced in the small space, the moonlight dripping over the room and coating them both in a soft glow. 

"Fine, but the other two will be named by me," Cyrus said. They were both whispering, it must have been at least midnight and the other campers were asleep. 

"Whatever you want," TJ said sweetly, "I'll give you anything you want."

Cyrus' eyes fluttered, "I love you," he said as he traced along TJ's cheekbone. 

"You already told me that," Tj laughed a bit. 

"When?" Cyrus said, confused. 

"When you were on pain meds," Tj laughed a bit. 

"Whe-, The pain meds that you caused me to be on?" Cyrus joked and lovingly shoved TJ.

"Look I'm really really sorry you have no idea how sorry I am," Tj said. 

Cyrus kissed him to shut him up, "TJ, it's no big deal, you just traumatized me and now I can never go around another river." TJ rolled his eyes and sighed. 

"Well, I love you too," TJ said as he looked into Cyrus' eyes, "And I have for a long time." 

The next few weeks went by too quickly. Cyrus' new routine now involved following around TJ and cheering him on as he played sports Cyrus didn't know the name of. They spent most of the day whispering to each other and holding hands. TJ was fond of the wildflowers around the willow tree and would bring Cyrus a bunch every morning before breakfast. Cyrus would proudly wear a couple behind his ears as they held hands and went to different camp activities. 

None of their friends were surprised when they got back together, not even Jonah who apparently didn't know they had broken up. 

Finally, it was time for the last CC, the obstacle course. For some ungodly reason, Buffy had placed Cyrus in the game. There were six stations at the obstacle course; a balance beam, a bean bag toss, a tunnel of some sort, a jump rope, a climbing thing Cyrus didn't know the name of, and a single Rubik's cube on a table. The rules were simple, explained Counselour Moose, whoever finished first won.

"Buffy, I can't do it. I'm not good with pressure involving athletism," He had told Buffy, his cabin leader. 

"Yes you can Cyrus, now go," she placed him by the table with the Rubik's cube. Cyrus looked around the field. The four other teams were assembled. TJ gave him a wave from his obstacle course, Cyrus smiled and gave a wave back. Cyrus was bouncing his leg as soon as Counselour Moose blew the whistle. From down the line, Cyrus saw his team members finish their part of the game and tag the person in front of them. He didn't dare look over at the other teams, he had a feeling that if he did he would surely feel 100% more nervous. Why did Buffy give him the last part of the course? Why did she hate him so? 

And then, to Cyrus' horror, Natalie climbed over the climbing thing and tagged him on the shoulder, "Go Cyrus!" she said to a motionless Cyrus. He then clambered to the table and picked up the rube. Suddenly, he forgot what colors go with which. 

"What does blue look like?" Cyrus murmured to himself as he moved the little cubes around and around. The crowd was now screaming white noise, he forced himself to take a deep breath. After what seemed like forever, Cyrus finally figured out the cube and ran to ring the bell.

"Done!" Cyrus yelled out, just as TJ said: "Finished!" Cyrus looked around confused as the crowd mobbed them. Oak and Aspen were still trying to figure out the cube, but TJ and Cyrus had tied. Tied. That never happens. 

Buffy lifted him as she and the others surrounded him and congratulated him. Cyrus was giddy, he had never won anything sports-related in his entire life. The feeling was new and exciting. He hadn't lost! 

"Tied!" Buffy and Andi told him, "You did so good Cy!" Buffy praised. 

"Do you know what that means?" Andi said.

"That I didn't lose?" Cyrus asked. 

"Yes!" Andi and Buffy both hugged him. Cyrus looked over at TJ who also had a smile on his face and was being greeted by his cabin members. 

Later, during the End of Camp Ceremony, Tj and Cyrus sat shoulder to shoulder holding hands as Counselour Moose tallied off the points. Iris' cabin had won over Amber's by 300 points. But it turned out that the tie meant Redwood and Willow tied exactly. They both had won. There would be three trees planted in their honor named Iris, Buffy, and TJ. 

"Cyrus! D'you hear that?! We both won!" Tj shook with joy as he took Cyrus' face in his hands and kissed him in front of everyone. Cyrus instantly loved camp. 

As soon as camp began, it ended. Cyrus had to say goodbye to his plain roommates, the forest with its freaky animals, the cool waters, even the cat he called Sigmund. For the first time ever, Cyrus felt like he would miss Camp Lowland. Maybe he'd miss it because TJ would miss it. He didn't know, but it didn't matter. 

He'd have to go back to Shadyside, with its deadlines and stress, but at least he wouldn't be so alone this time. 

"You ready?" TJ said as he took Cyrus' bag for him and held out his hand. Cyrus gave a soft nod and met TJ's hand with his. Cyrus had a yellow flower behind his ear as they walked away from Camp Lowland.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading this y'all :( let me know what you think in the comments or tell me on tumblr !!1 my url is frisbee-camp can you believe andi mack is over because i dont and im still crying about it.... thank you for reading you have no idea how much it means to me that you sit and read my dumb gay fics :( if you liked this one then check out my other longer slowburn fic "let me help" just visit my profile, thanks again guys seriously!!! <3
> 
> also lmk what you think in the comments or lmk on my tumblr @ frisbee-camp


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